so afraid of getting older, I'm only good at being young!

Well, I have OFFICIALLY begun my new summer job working with CarePartners In Home Healthcare! I am so excited about it! Being with patients makes me so excited about my future career in nursing! I absolutely am just so happy to be around PEOPLE and to be able to help them and hang out with them, to keep them company and help them do things they can't do alone. I am so thankful that God has given me the passion to want to help people. I have recently also realized that I am growing up. It really did hit me this past weekend when I attended a wedding for some of my good friends. It seems like love is in the air, with weddings and engagements. I guess summer is the season from weddings and proposals though. I know that growing up is a part of life, and I guess it continues to hit you over the years that "yes... you ARE getting older!" and for some reason it always continues to be a shock.

My summer class is also winding down... in a sense... I have 6 classes left, and 5 tests. I am so ready for it to be over. I think the stress from this class has taken years off of my life. I realized that in 20 class periods of 2 hours each, (and approximately 20 hours a week of studying outside of class!)I have tried to cram into my mind information that is usually spread out into 4 months and separated into 2 classes. That is just unbelievable!! I am sure that I did not go as in depth as those people who have taken the classes over an entire semester, but I now have an appreciation for taking classes over a longer period of time.

So this blog has been kind of schizophrenic, but it's what I've been thinking about while layin' here on my bed relaxing after class, and thought that I would just share since I havn't updated in awhile!

Hope all is well with everyone!!

Lookin' Back... *whistles tune*

I shamefully confess that the lyrics to Garth Brooks' "The Dance" went through my head this afternoon and somehow the REPEAT button in my mind has been pushed ONE TOO MANY TIMES since this cheesy, sappy tune came to my mind.
How did this song pop into my head you ask?! Well... after checking my e-mail today... I saw that I had almost a thousand sent e-mails in my "sent mail" folder. So, I decided to look at how long ago I had sent my first e-mail in my "sent mail" folder. I don't remember exactly when that was right now... but I know that it was from 2005. I had e-mails on their from people I talked to in high school and have not talked to since! *Lookin' Back.... on the memory of... the dance we shared... " so you know the rest of the song, and if you don't... I understand why not. I used to be a rather big fan of Garth Brooks. I actually was just talking about my first Garth Brooks concert last night with some friends, (which may be the reason this song came to mind so quickly...).
Anyways... the moral of the story is that I began thinking about how 2 years ago did not seem like that long ago. I graduated high school 2 years ago... but my high school graduation seems like lightyears ago! Then.. I stumbled across an e-mail that I had sent to my cousin Easter of 2005. In this e-mail.. were pictures of my Pap and I coloring easter eggs. My feelings went from being kind of silly, (from the Garth Brooks flashback) to completely somber. I realized that it will be almost a year since my Pap went into the hospital, a day I will never forget. I began to reflect on all the things of 2 years ago.. that I no longer have. High school friends, my Pap, mediocre study habits (i've straightened those up since high school.. trust me!)...
I started thinking about how A LOT can change in a short period of time. This led me to thinking about going away to Wesleyan in the fall. I am going to be there for 3 years. I am so excited to see what changes in those three years.. and at the same time... am scared of what could change. I don't want to lose friends that I have here in Morgantown like I lost friends from high school when we started a new chapter, I don't want to lose anymore family... I guess that this is where my favorite scripture comes into play. And not just memorizing this but actually living by it and believing that it is true.
So I will end with one of my favorite bible verses that my mom used to print out and put on all of our vanity mirrors. "For I know the Plans I have for YOU, declares the Lord. Plans to PROSPER You and NOT to HARM You. Plans to give you HOPE For a FUTURE" Jeremiah 29:11. I can only HOPE that what God has for my FUTURE is what I seek, and not just seeking what I want for my Future!

"That's so annoying!!!!!"

This is just a random post to get some thoughts out there..

So of recent, I've been noticing a lot of my "pet peeves"... I'd like to say that I'm a very patient person... but I won't lie... in some instances, my patience is lacking. These are a few of my pet peeves....

1. Chewing/Chomping

--For some reason, I CANNOT stand the sound of people chewing, or swallowing liquids. Now, I realize that with my career choice, I may come into contact with this every once in awhile. For that reason, I am trying to weene (is that how you spell it? apparently not.. thanks spell checker! --ween-) myself off of this bad pet peeve of mine. I try to be patient. I have realized that the "count to 10" issue is not actually affective. So, I am trying to conquer this pet peeve. ALSO, Chewing with your mouth open! UH! I realize that sometimes it is hard to do, (I confess... I do it myself...) but I just feel like if you're going to say something longer than a few words, CHEW YOUR FOOD! no one wants to see the ABC's "Already Been Chewed" food in your mouth! GROSS!!!


2. Driving on the Interstate in the Fast Lane at 65 MpH.OKay... so on the interstate, in WV, the Speed Limit is 70. Am I not correct? OKay... well... could someone PLEASE explain to me WHY people want to travel in the left lane "the FAST lane" going BELOW the speed limit? I will never understand this concept. You cannot PASS someone that is going 70.. if you are going 65!!!


3. Blue Tooth Cell TechnologyI hate when I see people walking down the street talking, and I ASSUME that they are talking to me, considering both arms are down and their line of vision is in my direction, and they are talking. Then, I see that little nub sticking out of their ear, after feeling like an idiot because I am trying to figure out if you are crazy or I am because you don't look familiar.

These are just a few pet peeves I've noticed lately... if anyone is with me, or has a different opinion.. let me know in my COMMENTS...

Lovin' and Leavin'--Life is FULL of Changes!

Like my title clearly states--life is full of changes! As I lie here on my bed, writing my first blog for many months now, I am sure you have ALL been checking this site every hour of the day waiting for me to update on life.... okay... so I'm dreaming. HAHA!

So, I finished my last semester at WV U and ended up with a 3.6.. the best I've done in college so far! I got 3 A's and 2 B's. So you can Imagine how I felt when my cumulative GPA went from 2.78 to a 2.98 in hopes that when I begin NURSING SCHOOL @ WEST VIRGINIA WESLEYAN COLLEGE IN THE FALL-- yes folks--I FINALLY got got into Nursing school! I am so excited to go away and get the college experience. I will be living in the dorms and will be a sophomore in the nursing program there.

God has been in charge of this decision 100%. He has blessed me so much and I have learned that trusting in GOD'S TIMING is the most important thing. Let me tell you a little about my journey into getting accepted there...
First, I called the dean of the nursing school there and made an appointment to go speak with her. Mom and I went to meet with her and a financial aid adviser in March or April I believe. The dean was so kind and so understanding of what I have gone through in my adventures of my first 2 years of college and applying to nursing schools and being let down. From that point on I was accepted to the program. (I met all the requirements)... so I applied to the college and got accepted. Both my admission counselors got in touch with me... unlike most colleges where you have to call 3 different people before you get your admission or adviser HE CALLED ME and we talked for 45 minutes. It was so great to get to know him and I began feeling so comfortable in my decision to go to school there.
From this point on I began getting scholarships--I got a $9,000 one for my GPA then a $5,000 scholarship for character and GPA and all that. The money began coming in and I knew God was leading me to WVWC without a doubt in my mind

I am so excited to move on with my life, and yet at the same time... I am so afraid to leave (hence the beginning of the title "lovin' and leavin'") but I know this is what God wants. It is so comforting and exciting KNOWING that you are doing what GOD Wants in your life. For all those people who say you can't know for sure... as much as I doubted it in the past I now know that there outlook is totally misguided. Even though God did not come into my room one night and say "Katy-You will go to WV Wesleyan and you WILL be a Nurse!" I KNOW that this is what He wants because every door has been opened, answering my prayer that this would happen. I am nervous about how hard the program is going to be, I am nervous about having a roommate, I am nervous about leaving home, I am nervous about the Christian community there, I am nervous about love and where it's gonna go, I am nervous about a new place and new situations... but through all that my EXCITEMENT outweighs the nervousness!! :-)

Through all this I have learned patience and trust. Believe me, I am still pretty impatient and I am still learning to enjoy the day that God has blessed me with instead of living for the next chapter, I know that in GOD'S time He will get me to where He wants me to go, and that is an amazing feeling!

Thanks to all those who have been praying for me,.. please continue! God is truly amazing and I am so blessed!

Katy

New Outlook- Thoughts at 2 a.m.

So it is right now 4 minutes until 2:00 a.m. and I am awake. I have no idea why... but here I am... wasting my life away on the internet, and I thought to myself... "now would be a great time to get my thoughts on a blog". A few people have asked me why I havn't been keeping this updated, and so I thought now the opportune time.

As I lie here wondering what in the world I should write about... I guess I am going to go ahead and just write about what I have been thinking lately, and about what I have been going through in my life spiritually, and emotionally.
Life is definitely a rollercoaster. I have most definitely realized this in my 20 years of life. That may not seem like many years to some of you, but to me, I feel like I have learned a lot. College has been a great eye opener in my life, and I feel like this past year alone I have grown so much and sort of realized a lot of traits, or characteristics, no... that's not what I'm looking for... maybe... well I suppose I have just realized who I am. Though, I am still learning and developing as an adult, I feel like even in the past few months, weeks, days even that I have learned a lot about myself. As we grow up in high school, we feel like we have reached our knowledge, we know who we are, and develop sort of that "high school attitude" of being all knowledgeable. Our parents, peers, grandparents, no one can tell us anything we do not already know. WHOA! Was I wrong! This rollercoaster I mentioned earlier? Well college has been the biggest rollercoaster of my life. When I started college, I was ready... I did not always know what I wanted to do with my life... in fact... i still could not tell you for SURE! However, in high school I decided that I had a deep desire and a passion to become a nurse. I wanted to be able to take care of sick people. I imagined myself bedside of my patients, taking care of their every need, making them comfortable in a rough time. So here I am with this dream... this dream that at times has seemed that it would absolutely never be possible. A dream that has been denied, turned down, shot to the ground, trampled on, thrown out, and a girl who has been told it is not possible. "You're just not good enough, you will have to work harder." ................................ ......................................
As I lay silently, and heavily asleep this past Saturday morning, my father knocks on the door and I hear "Well Katy, here is the moment of truth" in my groginess I roll over and pretend I did not hear him (i'm not much of a morning person)... "There is a letter from WVU School of Nursing here"... I tell him "oh boy...it's probably just saying they got my application". Well, I grab my glasses, and rip open the letter. I look to the first line of the later following the "Dear Katy," NO CONGRATULATIONS! ... CRAP! Side Note: in applying to the WVU School of Nursing, I was well aware that I was more than likely not going to be accepted... however I had a little bit of hope that they would take into consideration an interview. .. "We are sorry to inform you that your grade point average is not suitable for an interview... blah blah blah... we wish you the best in pursuing a career in Nursing". I look to my Dad and say.. "Yeah that was to be expected" and rolled back over in my bed but could not fall back asleep. I got out of bed and called my mother and let her know the news. The last words I spoke into that telephone were "I'll show them!"

and now to my main point....

I am still waiting to hear from Fairmont State... hence... my sleeplessness tonight. I got a letter saying that I should hear from them by the "latter part of February". ... There are 7 days left of February...

Since last year I have gone through so much in trying to figure out what I should do. Highs and lows, (the rollercoaster.......) from being told by the dean of nursing here at WVU that it was pointless for me to even apply with my GPA... to being told by my sick grandfather "Katy you will be a GREAT nurse someday". Thank You Pap!! I think I'll stick with the latter.

Finally, my mother has always told me in times of trials, and in times of rejoicing, "For I know the plans I have for you", Declares the Lord, "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you HOPE for a Future." Jeremiah 29:11. I have tried my hardest to live my life by this quote. I know that my life is in God's hands, and that at his right hand is Jesus, who died for my sins and all of the world. I know that if the master and the creator of the universe can create such a great masterpiece, that I can rejoice, in KNOWING and trusting... and being EXCITED that whatever God has in store for me... will be an amazing life just because it is what HE has for me. I am so glad that I can be at peace with that. I do not mean to contradict the entire last paragraph... and maybe somebody out there can give me some words of advice or words of wisdom.... I know not to pray for patience. But how do I get rid of this constant anxiousness and impatience in waiting for what God has for me... (The Letter from Fairmont State University about Nursing School... and then waiting until March sometime about Respiratory Therapy...)

This is an extremely long blog, and I am not even sure it makes any sense.... But I just wanted to update and get my thoughts out to everyone. Thank you for reading... if you made it all the way through I am impressed! I will be sure to update whenever I hear God's plan!!

I love you all and God Bless!!!

Katy :-)

it is now 2:21 a.m.... GOODNIGHT!